Has Someone You Love Recently Lost Weight?

Shout out to my college roomie, Valerie, who encouraged me to seek help for my disordered eating before I knew I had disordered eating.

If someone you love has recently lost weight, here are ten suggestions of things to say to them.

1. How are you?

2. Have you seen a good tv show on Netflix lately?

3. Are you excited about the Super Bowl this year?

4. How’ve things been with your family?

5. I am so grateful to have you as a friend.

6. Want to meet up for lunch or coffee soon?

7. Update me on your life! What are you excited about?

8. I am always here for you, let me know if you need anything.

9. Let’s go see the new Spiderman movie, I heard it's awesome!

10. And ONLY If they mention their weight loss→ I am so happy you feel good in your body right now!

Why not compliment them on their weight loss?

Three simple reasons:

1. In our culture, we make such a fuss over weight that people quickly start to equate their worth with their weight. You making a comment reinforces that belief.

2. Weight loss isn’t necessarily a good thing. Our culture would make you think it is, but that’s simply not true.

3. For most of our friends, their intentional weight loss plans will end in a cycle of eventual weight gain and shame. Being overly excited for them now, might indicate to them that you will be disappointed when they go “off the wagon.”

Your loved ones need your support. This is an invitation to support them more deeply, not exchange diet tips and tricks. Your love for them does not depend on their size, so don't let your words indicate that it might.

Thanks for being open to thinking about this with me.

If you want to learn more about my work with intuitive eating check it out.